Why Should I Write?

It’s been a while since I last used WordPress, and almost 9 months since I last wrote a blog post. Something reminded me why I keep paying a small amount of money every month to keep this blog up, and it’s that I used to find writing my heart out to be satisfying.

Some people write because they have an audience, but even the most prolific of writers started without an audience. Even in the age of Facebook and Twitter, where speaking one’s mind can either be a series of Tweets, or a long Facebook post that disappears into the thousands other posts that are on our timelines; there are still people who prefer to write blogs.

At times I don’t have a friend to talk to, and I end up writing something down. Other times I want to share something awesome with the world. Writing is good, maybe some science researcher out there has proven that writing is good, but it shouldn’t matter.

Reading is more important, because a writer who does not read is like a leader who cannot follow. I’m looking at the end of the second month of 20166, and most of my resolutions of attaining balance in my life are out the window. I have a collection of books that I’ve stopped increasing because I’m very behind in reading.

How do avid readers to it? They say “pick up a book and read”. How do the dedicated joggers wake up every morning and spend an hour running? They say “get up, put on your running shoes and run”.

My biggest troubles are that I live under the self-imposed perception that I don’t have time, and that I’m so used to fighting that I am a soldier always at war.

So, why should I write?

For a long time in my life, I’ve had a passion to write, a dream to write children story-books at that. Should we follow all our passions as they make us who we are? I don’t know.

I’ve grown quite vocal about politics over the years, but no I don’t wish to write about politics, I enjoy reading the political commentary that the likes of The Daily Mavericks publish, and I’d rather continue being a reader than a writer.
I have come to learn that I don’t know a lot about our country and continent’s history. I would rather be a reader of those, although most of the time they seem to gravitate around Black Consciousness, but that’s a topic for another year as I’m seen as neo-liberal by my friends.

So why should I write?

Every Tongue in Judgement You Shall Condemn

I was sharing a video on Facebook, and ended up writing a story below it. This was probably the better place to share what The Lord placed in my heart.

“No weapon formed against you shall prosper, and every tongue which rises against you in judgement you shall condemn. This is the heritage of the servants of The Lord, and their righteousness is from Me” Says The Lord. – Isaiah 54:17

I’ve always quoted the first part of the verse, because of course no weapon formed/fashioned against me shall prosper, but it is only in growing have I started to understand the meaning, implications and impartation of the full scripture.

We have the power in Jesus’ authority to condemn the tongue that rises against us in judgement. This is our heritage as Isaiah 54:17 proclaims, and it has been completed by the seal of the Holy Spirit!

We are a people living in a time where chaos is the rule of the land, where defeat is the meal of the day. We are being attacked in the workplace, in our land, there is conflict within our families, and we can no longer tell between our fleshly desires and the enemy’s fiery darts. Our houses are not in order, and we can’t let our pathless wandering be our defeat.

The bible says that the power of life and death is in the tongue. There are tongues that are rising against us in judgement, and we can’t be silent and let them exercise the power of death. Christ came that we may have life, and have it abundantly. It is now the hour for us to boldly proclaim that over our lives. God Himself said that we shall condemn tongues rising against us. It is not an option, it is not for our priests and pastors to do on our behalf; it is our call in this hour.

It is time we speak life unto our lives, unto our families, communities, nation. The workplace is arid with no prophetic vision. We did not graduate to balance books nor be couch potatoes and Twitter activists, but to take charge and walk in the prophecies declared unto us.


The Longing

Life gets busy, sometimes it gets noisy with pretense of busyness. Either way, it gets busy.

Busyness sometimes means that one is productive, but how much productivity becomes cancerous to the soul? I found myself wondering this weekend when I was writing down all the things that I needed to achieve by the end of the weekend. Even when I wasn’t being ambitious, it felt like I was about to climb a sizeable mountain, and without the right equipment at that!

For a number of years, perhaps since the start of my career, I’ve found that there are seldom times where I can just relax all weekend knowing that there’s nothing that demands my attention. I can’t remember the feeling of leaving work at the end of the day, knowing that I don’t need to do any work until I switch on my laptop again the following day.
I’ll admit that I’ve been affected by the negativity of deadlines that require extra work at night from home, such that whenever I turn on my work laptop, I feel a bit of depression. This happens even when I’m not turning the laptop on to do work.

Ticking Clock

I’ve just come off the back of a 1-month off-work vacation. I didn’t do much travelling cos money, so I ended up working on projects for half the time, and relatively relaxing for the other half of my time. So one can say that I’m rested, but then why am I feeling exhausting if I’m well rested?

As I paused to catch a thought, I noticed an increment to a minute. Stare at the clock for a bit longer, and I would have noticed a few more increments. Thing is that when I take a breather, time doesn’t take one with me.

This brings me to the first problem that I encounter: I feel that I lack the ability to manage my time well. Everything has its time, but lately I feel like everything wants all my time.

Clearly the solution here is to learn to make more time so I can allocate the time to everything that needs it, or is it?

Equal Time

We can all agree that each man on the universe has 24 hours in a day, none have more, and none have less. So time is not a relative thing, at least that’s what the above would lead me to conclude.
If time is absolute, how come is it that some of us can’t use it as well as other people.

I remember a while ago when I was considering getting into a relationship with a girl I liked, but I would have a tough time with taking a few evenings off to see her. She told me that we make time for the things and people we care about.  I also once read somewhere that if Barrack Obama can make time for his wife, then I’ve got no excuse … (Or something along those lines).

True then, we all have equal time, so then why am I failing to use it to the best of my ability, or to use to to serve my purpose (spirit, soul, body).

  • Why do I keep saying that I can’t join gym because it will take time that I already don’t have?
  • Why have I not learn to play the guitar that I bought 4 years ago?
  • Why can’t I make enough time to read, play chess, go watch cricket, go on picnics, etc?

I am coming to believe that the reason why I can’t do all the above is because of how I view time.

If I considered a minute important, and took care of it, the minutes would take care of the hours, and so on.

Yes, this is the same as “take care of the cents, and the cents will take care of the Rands” [or whatever currency].

What I long for

I really long for that feeling where I don’t have anything in my backlog of TODOs, or a deadline that I’m chasing. Is it such a hard thing to want?

I don’t think it’s a hard thing to want, but it is something I can work on. After all, most things are often in our control to influence. This does not mean that working on what I long for would be easy, but I’m willing to try my hand at it once again.

I’ve heard a number of times people talking about temporal vs. eternal pleasure/joy/happiness. This is mostly ingrained in my religion, that as Christians we “fight the good fight”, we labour in the Earth looking forward to the day when our joy is complete.
The opposite is very evident, such that whether or not one is of a certain religion, we could agree that we can label the above as a principle. Take varsity for example, a lazy student who enjoys the pleasures of the present moment often comes to regret it when they don’t complete with good grades. Another example is someone who doesn’t save up enough for retirement.

What can one do?

My longing is probably something that other people who’ve made themselves very occupied share. I don’t want to share this longing anymore though, so I’m resolving to work on either attaining it.

I’m going to continue with my backlog of every single thing that I need to do, and tackle it as long as the day is “Today”.
Some ideas that I’ve been considering are:

  • Start allocating my time better, and stick to the allocations. For example, when I’m home in the evening, I make sure that 20:00 – ~21:30 is my reading  and prayer time.
  • Look for things that I can complete in a short period of time, and use some of my idle time in working on them.
  • Work harder on making more efficient tools for myself. I am a part-time software developer, and I can sometimes benefit from spending 3 nights writing a tool that will make me save a few weeks’ worth of work. (AUTOMATE ALL THE THINGS?).
  • Plan activities that I want to do, block time out for them, and work harder before them so that I don’t feel guilty with taking the time off.
  • Take better care of my body? Easier said than done, but it shall be done.


I think like every odd overly ambitious person in their working life, I suffer from the cycle of dissatisfaction. In this instance my dissatisfaction is with my working most of the time not resting. I think though that in this instance I might have to work harder so I can relax.
I know it’s quite odd, and I’m probably not making much sense, but I felt like writing down what was on my mind before I get back to work 🙁

Hating Sin as Sin [John Owen]

John Owen talking about hating sin, here he was laying the principle that sometimes we want to mortify a particular sin because it grieves us, and gives us no peace.

If you hate sin as sin, every evil way, you would be no less watchful against everything that grieves and disquiets the Spirit of God, than against that which grieves and disquiets your own soul. It is evident that you contend against sin merely because of your own trouble by it. – Overcoming Sin and Temptation [page 87]

I’ve been trying to deal with a particular sin in my life, but I acknowledge that most times that I try to deal with it, it’s because that it makes me unhappy to be battling with it. In trying to rise up against it, I’ve found that I would not be sensitive to other things that I do, not taking care to ensure that I keep to my prayer and reading.

I haven’t been hating sin as sin, but I’ve been hating it because it takes away my peace.

Be Acquainted with Your Heart [Owen Daily]

This was from the introduction to the book, where Owen was talking about us knowing our hearts, as we can’t fight sin if we don’t know our temperament and how to deal with it.

Be acquainted, then, with thine own heart; though it be deep, search it; though it be dark, inquire into it; though it give all its distempers other names than what are their due, believe it not.

John Owen [Overcoming Sin and Temptation; page 30]

John Owen Daily

There is a wonderful book by John Owen (one of the Puritans from the 16th century) that I learnt about some time late 2012. I’ve felt that the Spirit had drawn me to discovering and reading it. Its title is called “Overcoming Sin and Temptation”.

It is honestly a difficult read, both in the form of language (old English by a buff, but has been ‘modernised’) as well as the depth of what it talks about. Sin is a difficult topic which all of us Christians should deal with, and which most of us easily stumble against.

I couldn’t “find” a print copy of the book, mainly because I didn’t have the will to put up a significant amount of money to pre-order it. I feel very cheap 🙁 . At the end of 2013, there was a bookstore in Pretoria called the Augustine Bookroom, which was unfortunately closing down. I can’t remember how i found the bookstore, but they had a fire sale which had a lot of the works of the Puritans and other authors from centuries gone. I found John Owen’s book, and placed an order for a copy.

Long story short, I got the book delivered in April while I was still in Canada, and I had embarked on starting to study it from scratch when I returned. I used to have a PDF copy which I got online, but it was a difficult read as I couldn’t make notes nor read at my normal pace.

Anyways, after what’s been going on in my life recently, I sense the Spirit stirring me to go back to the book, and start reading and studying it afresh. It’s really a wonderfully written book, and it has a lot of shareable snippets.

My intention in keeping to my allocated time of studying it, is to share a lot of these snippets. Some might fit Twitter, most might not. I’ll instead keep posting them on my blog.

So here’s to John Owen daily! I hope that this keeps me accountable to myself to keep to what the Spirit of The Lord is awakening in me.